IF MAJOR LEAGUE Baseball is a giant, century-old tortoise inching ever closer to a slow, lonely death, the minor leagues are a shot of adrenaline right in the ass—if only the dying tortoise can just…get there…in time. The minors are where all of baseball’s ingenious ideas are conceived, with no gimmick too dumb so long as it fills seats. Big-league teams have generally scoffed at such antics. But with the game’s popularity nose-diving hard—only 6 percent of 18-to 34-year-olds consider it their favorite sport, per Gallup—the majors could stand to ditch some of its buttoned-up traditions and go a little nuts. Here’s what MLB can learn from MiLB this season to get swole again.